Chameleon in a crowd:
I don’t think I am afraid of being lonely
I take that back
I am afraid of being alone
I know how to be on my own
And yet there are moments in life
when it feels like it is wasted time
Where if I am the only one enjoying, there’s no point
That it was wasted on me and me alone
when I just want to share it with someone I hold dear
I don’t crave that busy chaotic world
where everyone needs to be around me and I can never be alone
But I do fear that this isolation I experience is all due to… me
I protect myself from the world outside and yet my world is so small I fear no one can find me
—not even myself
Who is the real me? You will never know
And that tears at me from the inside
I wish you could truly know me
Yet it is something that I will never let happen
I can’t trust myself, let alone you
And so you only get a glimpse
of the version of me you wish to see and the one I let be
Put me in a room of those who know me and they would all know someone else
Because I am like a chameleon in a crowd
who adjusts to moods and personas and is quiet when you are loud and will talk if you will listen
But sometimes….sometimes this chameleon can forget what its true colors really are
Continue reading: He Cares.
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